That Was a Good Show!

Clearly my memory is short.  Or I waited way too long between children...  I thought that as Little Miss gets older, things like shopping would continue to get easier. 

Nope.

LET'S GO SHOPPING!

Last night I picked up Little Miss from daycare, and told her we would be going to the store.  That was my first mistake (I didn't yet know at that time) but in my defense, I do occasionally take her to the store to pick something up for dinner. 


As we walked away from daycare, towards the car, she began to run away from me.  I tried shouting to make her stop, but as we were on a road (a small, quiet residential one, but a road nonetheless) I quickly ran after her. 

Like a dog, she finds it very entertaining when I have to chase her.  I caught up with her and held her hand.  She then began to flop.  We live in a cold climate have a ton of snow and ice left here, which is in the process of melting.  A lovely layer of sludge and mud now exists on the road.  She tried valiantly to drop into it.  My other hand was full, so, being careful that her arm was not pulled off or hurt, I kept trying to get her to stand and walk.

RAGGEDY ANN

I discovered that my sweet girl is much like
Raggedy Ann when she wants to be...floppy... like a wet noodle.

 

 



Although we avoided dropping into the mud on the way to the car, while I got my keys out she found success.  She dropped to her knees, and then instantly regretted it.  Her little pink pants and boots were covered in wet, dirty, drippy, cold mud.  She screamed, and then began to cry the biggest tears over her 'ditty pants'.
 
BAD MOM ALERT

A good mom might have gone home and changed her, buuuuut the grocery store was nearby, and I knew that if we went home, we wouldn't go back out.  I took my crying, muddy girl to the grocery store - we kind of looked like white trash.

WHO"S KID IS THIS?!?

At the store, she was pretty good, riding in the cart and singing at the top of her lungs.  Some shoppers smiled, while others moved away quickly, probably swearing under their breath. 

Speaking of swearing, at one point as her vocals reached glass breaking shrieks, I tried to 'shh' her.  She immediately shushed me back...then launched into a tirade of "Shhhit! Shhhhit!  Shit Shit Shit!!" over and over, getting progressively louder.  Of course she had a grin the size of a dinner plate as she shouted, knowing this is not a nice word.

Now, moms of little ones, you know that the best way to dissuade this behaviour is to either ignore or redirect.  I started trying to ignore, but by the second or third SHIT, realized that if I didn't stop her, I'd burst out laughing.  And having done that before, I know that that is NOT going to solve the problem. 

I held up the list and began to loudly and animatedly talk about what we needed next "LOOK!  Pickles!  Let's get some PICKLES!!!  What kind would you like?!?"

PICKLES!!!!!

Ahh yes - insane shopping mommy wins this round, as the swearing ended quickly, forgottenin the swirl of gherkins and dills.

BUTTONS AND SUCH

I had picked up two pairs of Joe Fresh (love this stuff!) shorts for her, since she grows like a weed.  While I got eggs, she proceeded to rip the extra button provided with the shorts, and try to pull the actual button from the shorts.  I took the shorts, and then she popped the extra button in her mouth.  She normally doesn't put things in her mouth, but lately has been doing it for attention.  I counted to three and told her I would take the button (don't worry - I could still see it!).  She took it out, then popped it right back in.  I reached in, risking fingers and skin, and took the button.

FLYING PRODUCE!

We got to the line up, which is when the next fun began.  She likes to hand things to me, so I try to put only light, non breakable things in the top of the cart.  But this time, instead of helping, she began to launch things at the lady behind us.  The green pepper went flying.  The apples almost got launched.  The shorts were thrown to the floor.  The limes went everywhere.  I grabbed everything from the top as quickly as possible.

As I tried to put everything on the belt, she leaned over and tried to grab some magazines.  As I  quickly paid, she flung her boots off her feet and her hat on the floor.  She then popped the button back in her mouth.  The button???  How did she get it back?  Yup.  At some point my pick pocket daughter had reached in my pocket to retrieve her loot!  Thief!

Button back in pocket.  Boots on.  Boots kicked off.  Boots back on.  Boots kicked off.  Boots placed in cart.  Child cries because mommy won't put her boots on.  Mommy looks around waiting for child services to approach.

We finally got out of line, left the store and I thought I was home free.

At the car, I quickly placed the bags in the trunk, including the boots which caused more tears.  "I want my boots!" could be heard three aisles over. 

I pick up my muddy child (getting dirt on me in the process), and place her in her car seat...uhhhhh...TRY to place her in her seat.  For the first time ever, she becomes "Super Pole", becoming so rigid and stiff that I cannot get her bum into the seat.  Her ankles and head are touching the seat - but nothing else.  While fearing I might break her, I began to push her mid section into the seat, slowly, inch by inch, and once there, placed my elbow in the groove on the seat so she was in place for the belt. 

It was like wrestling an Octopus. 

 

 

On LSD.

Once she is fully strapped in, I walk around the car feeling like I have maybe won a small victory in finally heading home.  Yay Mommy!

As we waited to turn, she says in the most upbeat voice...

"That was a good show!"

Ummm, what?!?!?!?  I reply, "Show?  Did you go to a show?"

"Yes, that was a good show mommy!" she replies.

Well, I guess it was a show of sorts.  For the other shoppers. 

Random and Updates

First, the update - I am more than happy to report that our Little Miss has pooped twice today, and neither time was traumatic.  I won't go into too much graphic detail, but the fact that she was able to go with only a bit of fear evident, and that we could change her without her screaming like we were killing her, was so comforting.  Six more months of that and she will be able to forget the trauma (according to Dr. Google).  We do still intend to get her reevaluated by her doctor, but knowing we can help manage it by being diligent is wonderful and makes us feel like good parents.

Random...Today I bought some jewellery organizers.  I don't have much in the way of baubles and bling, and most of what I do own is costume jewellery, but I have struggled with what the heck to do with it.  I am not a fan of wooden boxes, as they make me feel like I am 12 again (although I saw a gorgeous floor standing jewellery chest at the Bombay Company that I would love to own if I could spend $600 on it!)

So here are my hanging things - the stands are plain but I love them.

And here is my small drawer with a lot of junk jewels... (and rest assured - the giant strand of pearls is one I made for a roaring 20's party!)















Awhile ago, my mom built me a cool shelf/hanging thing that held some necklaces and earrings, but it got too full, and things kept falling off the top.  I plan to still use it by painting it and installing it next to my new ones for longer chains (since my new stands aren't great for the longer ones).



Yesterday we went to the local Science and Tech museum with Little Miss.  The pics are blurry as my iPhone can only do so much but gosh she had fun!

Here she is changing the world...and then pulling daddy out of the tunnel slide.

And here she is pressing the buttons to ensure that the prime minister takes her call...

Learning how to use the system that old fashioned phone operators used...she failed badly.  lol

All in all - she had a blast, as did we!

That is all!  Happy week everyone!

Taking The Pain Away

I am so sad tonight.

My poor sweet girl has struggled for two days to poop.  Or better yet, to not poop. Every ten minutes or so, she goes off to the corner, tightens her little body into a rigid plank, and strains to not let herself poop.  Any efforts by us to try to convince her to use the potty, or just to let the poop come out, are met with screeching and fighting us (if we are close).  We just don't know what to do.

The same thing happened last weekend, and when she finally couldn't hold it back any longer, she passed a rather large, solid poop - then went six more times in 24 hrs.  of course the first 4 times were extremely painful.  It's a terrible cycle - the more she holds it in, the more compacted it gets and then the harder it is to eventually pass.  This causes pain and fear which reinforces her holding in the next one.

I am making her an appt with her doctor next week, but in the meantime, we will be using stool softener as a preventative measure - to at least help her continue to go regularly without pain.  She eats relatively well with a good amount of fruits and veggies, gets exercise daily and isn't on any meds that might cause side effects.

I have no idea what caused it this time, but we are doubling our milk-free efforts.  We just cannot keep doing this.  Tonight our poor girl was spent - exhausted from holding it in over and over for two whole days.  She did finally go, and then screamed, cried and fell asleep in my arms.  I held her for awhile after she was asleep, simply because it was all I could do to comfort her (and me too!)

So, while I am happy she has gone, I can't see her poor little body be put through this week after week. We have to figure this out!  For her health, for her happiness, and for the hopes of ever getting her toilet trained...it's pretty difficult to go on the toilet if you are stiff and straight as a board and terrified!

A Groovy Kind of Love

It's a good day I say!  My honey just sent me a sweet text (yes he will kill me for saying so).  It was one of those out of the blue, kind of sweet, romantic thoughts - a stretch for someone who gave me a camping tent for our first Christmas together.  And tire traction aids for our second Christmas together.  Like these...Tire Traction

Yup.  Let it sink in.  I didn't even know what they were.  And wasn't entirely sure I was not being punked, but I was not.

Many years, and many Christmases and birthdays later, he has improved in his gift giving.  His motto now, is that for every practical gift he gives me, he has to give a piece of jewellery.  Not a bad motto I say.  And I didn't even give it to him.

(**And to be clear, I don't consider myself a high maintenance girl when it comes to gifts - I am more than happy with a book, some bath stuff or a nice travel mug...just not car parts)

So anyway, his sweet text today reminded me of something he did last week that touched my heart.  I woke up, bleary eyed and dopey, got Little Miss some milk, and as I poured my coffee, I saw this next to the coffee maker...

 

 

 

And then as I got Little Miss's breakfast together, my heart melted when I saw her holding her very own note from Daddy

We love that guy to the moon and back!

Did You See Some Brain Cells Walk By?

Where do brain cells go when they appear to take a hiatus?  Do they actually die off and never return?  Do they just fall asleep, presumably from the 2am bed times (that are actually 5am after several hours of skyping people you see daily)?  Do they get muddled by the aforementioned lack of sleep?  WHAT, on god's green earth, would possess an 18 yr old to
A. Step in ink from an exploded pen and not notice?
or
B. Notice, wipe his foot on the CARPET to remove it, and then continue to walk around?!?

Exhibit A.  (Ignore how nasty the carpet looks - it is mainly terrible lighting - I did shampoo them all yesterday though!)
This showed up a few weeks ago.  We noticed a couple of random blue spots on the carpet.  Then we followed the trail.  Up the stairs...

Around the corner in his bedroom, where the vigorous foot wiping occurred..., and then finally through his room towards the area he normally keeps a garbage bin - I assume he then took off the offending sock and pitched it.  I guarantee it's mate is still somewhere in the abyss.

I mean, really???  18 years old?  Really?  Lord I hope that university education starts to have an impact on his judgement...although judging by some university educated adults I know, it may be a permanent affliction.  Sigh.

And now a fun pic.  I don't think it'll fit her this year, but gosh I fell in loooove with this sweet dress.  I had to have it!!  Unfortunately, my tomboyish daughter is beginning to dislike dresses...i will do everythign in my power to ensure she wears this - even if only for a photo!

Poopageddon

I have never in my life had poop be such a commonly talked about topic as now.  Little Miss appears to have a milk sensitivity.  She drinks both almond milk and soy milk, and we avoid cheese like the plague.

When she was 'diagnosed' (if you can call it that) she was 16 months.  Ever since we'd switched her to whole milk at 1 yr, she had been having trouble with pooping.  She'd go days and days without going, and then when she did, it was so painful.  i tried twice to suggest to her doctor that I thought it might be milk.  It all seemed to correspond.  "Nope" I was told.  Milk doesn't do that - she would have diarrhea.

But my mommy instincts kept telling me otherwise.  The end of the road came the week I had to give my poor girl an enema.  She had been struggling for days, bearing down, clenching her legs, screaming, then - no poop.  Five min later it would happen again.  Giving a 1 yr old an enema is terrible.  Basically I straddled her on the floor and tortured her - but it worked, and worked well.  When she did poop it was bigger than an adult sized poop.  Poor kid screamed to the point of almost vomiting.

That day I swore off milk for her - and but for a few smaller incidents, she's had easier bowel movements since then.  Every so often though, we have a flare up.  All last week she seemed to be having difficulties, but then would pass a small BM.  On Sunday afternoon, she woke from her nap screaming like she was in pain.  She was in the process of passing a monster sized, solid poop.  Over then next few hours, she had four more.  All caused her to cry, probably because she was already so very sore.  We have no clue what caused it this time.  We haven't cut out all milk (such as when I am cooking) but now I am thinking of completely cutting everything.  Hopefully she'll outgrow it as many kids do, but with my son also having milk problems at age 18, I suspect our life without milk will continue.

The bigger problem I foresee is that she is afraid to poop.  Completely.  Even when it's soft, she clenches her legs together tightly when she feels the need to poop.  She has expressed an interest in potty training, and will pee on the potty but Will. Not. Poop.  I can't say that I blame her but I do think that at some point she will have to learn.  For now, we leave her be, because we don't want to increase the trauma...someday though, she'll have to poop in the potty!